Indy & The Duke

“Why are you downcast? Why so disturbed within me? Put your hope in God, for I will yet praise Him, my Savior and my God.” (Psalm‬ ‭43:5‬ ‭NIV‬‬)

Dealing with loss while looking towards the future is a tough balancing act. The best part of being a Christian and a part of a loving church family is that you don’t have to face it alone. 

Even though we have lost both of our sons we have hope that God has a better plan for our little family. I feel that even harder than this loss is that of our fathers! I only knew my sons for a little while and they changed my life. 

Losing my father 3 years ago was difficult. He touched so many lives and brought many people to Christ. He was my hero and when I looked up to him I envisioned him as Indiana Jones. We watched those movies together a lot when I was little. So much of my character was shaped by my parents. 

I am writing this only a day after losing my husband’s father. Of course he didn’t have the same influence as my own father, but I knew him for 17 years. I learned to adjust and appreciate things in a different way because of him. I can’t see John Wayne or Johnny Cash without thinking of him. Since his eyesight was failing I got used to Siri’s voice reading him everything too. 

Both men struggled with completely different medical issues that caused their bodies to slowly shut down. No matter how much pain someone is in there is always that selfish side that wants to keep them here with you instead of letting them go to God. He is in control and knows what is best. 

As I look to the future I know it will be hard to have a child grow up without grandfathers. I understand this because I grew up with only my maternal grandparents because my father’s parents passed away before I was born. Even though my grandma had Parkinson’s I still have great memories, dancing with grandpa to Henry Mancini’s “Moon River” and going with him to visit grandma in an assisted living facility. 

Our future child will have great grandmas in the world! Both women have been great examples to me of how to raise children and love my husband for ALL of the reasons we say in our wedding vows. Both grandpas will be remembered and great stories will be told. 

 
“My flesh and my heart may fail, But God is the strength of my heart and my portion forever.” (Psalms‬ ‭73:26‬ ‭NASB‬‬)